So, your best buddy has finally found the girl of his dreams and you’ve been hand-selected to be one of his groomsmen. You are well aware that his wedding day is one of the most important days of his life, and as a groomsman, you’ve been honored with a special role in it. You’ll be by his side as he wades through the waters of preparation, the dozens of major choices that need to be made, and, of course, the big day itself.
This is your opportunity to man-up and be the type of responsible groomsman who makes sure his buddy has the time of his life. Being a good groomsman isn’t all about cigars and the stag party, you really need to put a bit of time and effort into becoming the great one your friend deserves.
Help with the Stag Party
Even if you aren’t the best man, there’s always room to help with the stag party. Out-of-town stag parties are an extremely popular trend right now, making the planning process more complex than ever. Expenses and travel routes are typically spread between all the groomsmen, making it a potential logistical nightmare. If no one is very familiar with the destination, offer to do some research on the best dining, activities, and bars to be found there. Reach out to the best man early on to help coordinate the stag do party with him, even if you’ll be staying local.
The groom’s group of groomsmen may include men who’ve been part of his life at various times. The group might include high school friends, buddies from college, friends from work, and relatives. A great groomsman will make sure that everyone gets to know each other and feels included in the group.
Try to avoid inside jokes or stories without inviting the groomsmen who weren’t there to join in the revelry. Go out of your way to make conversation or have drinks with the groomsmen you don’t know well. Having the groomsmen group getting along well will keep the groom from feeling like he has to play the role of gracious host.
Lend a Hand Before You Are Asked
All groomsmen say, “please let me know how I can help.” Be truly helpful and find specific tasks that you can offer to take on both during the planning process and on the day of the wedding or rehearsal dinner. You can offer to fetch the groom’s tuxedo or groomsmen suits, pick up family members at the airport, or help coordinate shuttles to and from hotels to the wedding. Any little thing you can take off the plate of the bride and groom will be greatly appreciated.
Remember it’s Not Just About the Groom
While your main duty is to be there for your buddy on his big day, being there for everyone else in the wedding party will ultimately help make sure his day is hassle-free. Remember that while getting ready for you means putting on a suit and making sure your hair is decent, the getting-ready process is a heck of a lot more extensive for the bridal party. The day starts at the crack of dawn and is jammed with professional hair styling, makeup, accessories, and, of course, catering to anything and everything the bride may need.
Offer early on in the day to help with anything the ladies may need. There will always be some potential emergency or item that is needed on the day of the wedding. This should go without saying, but don’t be shy or reserved about it, simply offer your help.
Be a Point Person on the Big Day
It’s the nature of guests to have some small inquiries on the day of the wedding. While they may seem like small questions to them, they can become overwhelming if they are being consistently asked of the bride, the couple’s parents, the wedding planner, or any other member of the wedding party that has an assigned duty. Familiarize yourself with all the details of the event so you can help answer any questions on the big day. For example, know where the gifts should go, when shuttles are departing to the reception, and where the guest book is located.
Add Some Pizzazz to the Party
Your groomsman duties don’t stop after the ‘I do.’ You are still a big part of the wedding and it’s your job to help make sure everyone has a blast at the reception. Go out of your way to focus on helping other people have a great time, not just hitting the open bar.
Introduce yourself to anyone who looks like they may not know many people. Ask the grandmother of the bride or groom to dance. Introduce guests to each other as you meet them. Ask if you can get anyone a drink refill. Tear up the dance floor and encourage people to join in. Basically, help everyone have an amazing time and feel included.
Beat the Photographer to the Punch
Take some great photos throughout the wedding that the couple would appreciate. Remember that the newlyweds typically don’t get to see photos from their photographer for a minimum of a few days. Make the effort to take candid photos of important moments and important guests throughout the ceremony and reception.
The bride and groom will be thrilled to have photos to immediately look over en route to their honeymoon. You can also go above and beyond by being the point person for a group email or airdrop to collect photos that other members of the wedding party took on the night of the wedding.